Friday, July 17, 2009

ramblings of a mother who is going crazy with the waiting!

I guess maybe the agency doesnt work on fridays. they are rarely available to answer the phone any other day of the week but I found that between 11 and 12 is a good time. today though no answer. so now we have to wait through the weekend.

Joseph(joey)
James
or Benjamin
are on my mind.

Eric likes Brenden Riorden and Parker. I imagine if I picked and name and stuck with it he would agree to anything at this point just to shut me up = )

It is so wonderful to read about all the families that are currently meeting/bringing home their kids right now. Encouraging to me that it IS possible even if it takes a looooong time. but gosh I want to see Sophie so bad. I want to see her soon to be brother whose name we havent decided on, he has the most impish smile. I cant wait to hug him. I adore daughters they have a special something, but sons, oh sons have something completely different. both are wonderful and special and unique in their own way. all I want is to hold them and hug them. I remember when I was waiting for Ethan. I couldnt wait to have him to ourselves and put his little jammies on him and cuddle him. oh those first days. I could barely contain the lump in my throat or the tears in my eyes as they put him in my lap screaming bloody murder. he wanted nothing to do with us, but all I could see was this is my boy, my child. here he is,finally, after all that waiting. I can hardley wait to feel that again. now if that paperwork would come through I could be one step closer to it! When we brought home Ethan people used to tell me I should write a book. Maybe some day I will. but for now all I want is to hold my kids. the ones who are here and the ones who arent here yet. I dont ask for the world, the children are my world. I want nothing more than to hold them and love them.